somewhere along the line, I started wondering why I felt so compelled to join in the throngs of users... hoarding friends I didn't really know, and posting statuses that would get the most "likes" or comments. I did some thinking, and decided to finally take the plunge and stop participating the the popularity contest that my facebook feed has become. I decided to see if the world would fall apart if I wasn't "connected" to everyone, all the time.
I decided to leave.
a few clicks later, I was asked a question:
are you sure you want to deactivate your account?
-insert person name here- will miss you.
[even though you haven't had contact with them in... months.
here's a photo of you with this person, and a link to send them a message.
a message which you won't be able to receive a reply to unless you stay on facebook.
which means you should probably just leave this page and stay on facebook.]
and then, after I scrolled down, I was asked another question:
why are you leaving? [answer required]
I have another Facebook account.
I get too many emails, invitations, and requests from Facebook.
I have a privacy concern.
I spend too much time using Facebook.
This is temporary. I'll be back.
I don't understand how to use Facebook.
I don't feel safe on Facebook.
I don't find Facebook useful.
My account was hacked.
these are obviously the only valid reasons a person would want to leave facebook.
I'm pretty sure if I had selected "privacy concern", a window would have popped up telling me all about the wonderful customizable privacy options of facebook. "I don't understand" would lead to a site tour. "too many requests" sends you to your notification options. etc, etc.
I chose "other", and tried to deactivate. but you aren't allowed to select "other" unless you give an explanation. they want to know the reason you are leaving.
my reason? I want to.
enter your password 3 times and decode a cryptogram, and you're finally deactivated.
[five minutes later they send you an email making sure you know you've deactivated,
and giving you a big easy "reactivate me" button.
seriously facebook, you're like the ex-boyfriend who can't take a hint. we're done.]