so much in my head today...

the past few weeks have been pretty crazy. and, well, not so great. I've been stressed out, and rediculously busy, and starting to get sick, and just feeling... off.

something pretty outrageous happened last week, a cumulation of several things that have been going on. at first I was just in shock, then so angry I knew I needed to wait before trying to address the issue, and then I started overanalyzing it until I was so confused that I just did nothing.

the way I deal with things is probably not very healthy. if I don't confront something, I internalize it and pain myself with it until I am miserable. NOT healthy. but it gets dealt with by my own rationalizations, no politics involved. I hate politics. and honestly I don't know what anyone else could have done with this specific problem. other than created a huge mess involving many people and at the end I would not be the injured party but the bad guy.

then I started feeling sick. probably caused by stress. I didn't run the 5k this weekend. I feel kindof guilty. but there was just no way it was going to happen. BUT Luke and I signed up to run an 8k in Philly the weekend before Thanksgiving. a little longer race but I've got 55 days to train for 5 miles. Matt is visiting that weekend and going to run with us. or should I say: leave us in the dust. I have never run an 8k before so I have no idea what to expect or what to compare it to. all I know is I need to stay healthy, keep running, and learn how to deal with excercising in the cold. guess I'm going shopping for running tights.

so the last month has been crazy. my running and health sort of fell off (and maybe my sanity?) and so did my photography. in quantity at least. it's depressing when you don't have time to do something you love. though my day at the orchard produced some great shots, and I recieved an overwhelming amount of positive feedback. at least 10 people have told me I should quit my job and become a photographer. true, these are my friends and relatives, not people with professional experience in the photography field- but it's still nice to hear. so thank you :)

lots of other stuff... but let's just save it for another day.

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