1.27.2010

theorems, charts, and equations

the goal is determined, but the path is uncertain. 

I'm in the waiting room. flipping through all the brochures and celebrity gossip magazines. gathering information, looking for a distraction. what comes next could be a little painful. it will definitely be different... an adventure both amazing and terrifying. so, I'm getting a little anxious waiting for them to call my name. I'm not sure how long I'll be here. 8 months... a year... and a half... or two? but I do know that the longer I have to wait to find out how I'm getting to where I'm going, the more rationalizing I'm going to have to do to keep myself sane.

I am having a hard time explaining this without giving the full explanation. I can't do that yet. so, let's talk in code. a is an event which can either happen or not happen. b is a task that must be completed if a happens. c is a situation we would like to occur, with the completion of b increasing the favorability of c. the eventual goal is d. let's make things more outrageous by presenting you with a set of theoretical limits and equations:

if a, then b. 
after b is complete, c or d. 
if c after b, then d after c.

if not-a, attempt c. 
if c, then d after c. 
if c not possible, then d. 

the path starts with either a or not-a .
b can only follow a.
c can follow b or not-a, but cannot follow d.
d can follow b or c or not-a.
the path ends at d.

would it be completely ridiculous for me to put this into a chart?

yes, it would. but I did it anyway. it helps me to be able to visualize my life into something that appears to be organized. because at this point, that's all I can do. that, and wait for the path to be revealed.

the goal is determined, but the path is uncertain.

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