8.31.2010

what I learned on my summer vacation

this has been a summer of big life changes and learning experiences.

I've learned that my compulsive need to plan can be quite useful. that planning, keeping track, planning, organizing, planning, re-arranging, and planning pays off in the end. walking the edge of sanity and stressing for weeks in advance of the wedding meant that on the actual day of, I had nothing to worry about.

I've learned that weddings can bring out the best in people. some of my wonderful family and friends surprised and humbled me beyond belief with their generosity and kindness. not just through gifts, but by actions and words, and moments I'll cherish for years to come.

and unfortunately, weddings can also bring out the worst in people. actions that vary from inconsiderate to destructive, from places both expected and not. I'm both proud and relieved that I didn't let any of it touch me during the actual wedding day. with time, some things have already turned into nothing more than a story to laugh about. while others cut deep once they fully sunk in, and are still a little too painful to talk about. suffice it to say: true colors were shown all around, and were duly noted.

I've learned that you can't substitute buttermilk for heavy cream, that you cant add warm liquid to an egg mixture, and that flour is always going to taste like flour. the baking blog isn't quite where I want it yet, but I'm still working. at least most of the mistakes are delicious.

I've learned that some people in this world just plain refuse to hold themselves to a standard. competence, accountability, punctuality... all foreign concepts. the only way to combat letting them drag you down is with endless optimism and persistence.

I've learned that it's ok, at age 25, to not be sure what you're doing with your life. to make a career change that makes you question your sanity. to dream of a place you've never been... or even simply a big, green yard and a kitchen full of natural light. no one ever said there was only one path through life, and I plan on taking an adventure.

I've learned that despite the uncertainty I experience in almost all areas of my life, there is one thing I will always be sure of: marrying Luke was the most right and good thing I've ever done in my life. he's my constant, the glue that holds me together, the wind beneath my wings (ok so that's a bit much) but seriously, I am so lucky, and so blessed, to have him.

I've learned that there will never be enough time. the to-do list will always be endless. things will always go wrong. but the point of life isn't to accomplish everything on time or perfectly. wedding, job, travel, whatever... you still need to make time for the things you enjoy. otherwise the tasks are all you can see. and so, despite my hectic schedule, I've signed up for a photography class. and while I haven't quite figured out what to with my "online identity crisis", I know that not blogging isn't the answer.

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